Anonymous asked: Could you please describe your ideal penis?
Attached to someone I like
And now Detachable Penis is stuck in my head.
And howling at the moon.
me: (I check my weather app) so, it’s going to start snowing over night. You told that guy he’s not to shovel, correct?
AuntMurble: I didn’t. but I will.
(I walk out of the room. because I fucking can’t with this. The guy that she
hired to shovel picked up his money while I was doing his job properly.
Murble promised that she was going to fire him)
AuntMurble: I can tell you are pissed.
me: (in a very calm voice) I am pissed. You are right about that.
I just don’t think it will solve anything to talk about it.
AuntMurble: I was going to hire that company so I can use an estate check but if you want to shovel instead.
I could pay you to do it…
me: you are paying someone to do a job that I did all last winter, for no money. I took over that job all last winter because that same person did a shit job last winter.
and now you’ve re-hired him and I’m the one going over there and finishing his shit job, for no money.
AND YOU ARE STILL PAYING HIM.
AuntMurble: I don’t know what to say.
me: I have to leave anyway.
AuntMurble: well, feel free to use my car.
me: you don’t get to do that. I’m only doing stuff for you.
AuntMurble: you are being cryptic.
me: I’m not doing anything for me. I’m only ever doing things for you and this family.
I’m cleaning and organizing Uncletttton’s house.
you don’t get to pretend like you are doing me a favor.
(I’m shaking and having trouble breathing)
AuntMurble: (she starts to say something) no you aren’t listening
me: I’m listening. I’m ALWAYS listening TO YOU.
AuntMurble: oh Jennifer. I am grateful for your help. What do you want me to do?
me: I think this situation is too fucked up to be fixed.
AuntMurble: because I’m an idiot!
( and she walks away)
me: I’m glad we could get to your classic exit line before I walk out the door.
(I walk out the door)